Lani Baron, Divorce Mediation Attorney in Newport Beach and Founder of Alternative Divorce Solutions discusses, “does hooking up lead to walking out” and her perspective on why that is one of the reasons why couples are getting a divorce:
Does Hooking Up Lead to Walking Out?
There are so many reasons that couples state they are getting a divorce. These reasons range from infidelity to financial problems, lack of communication and lack of trust. Interestingly, however, USA today says that how people hook up can predict whether or not they walk out. According to the study, if people got together due to a hook up (which could mean sex or any type of physical contact), rather than through dating, they had a higher chance of getting a divorce. The study claims that the way the couple meets is directly linked to their level of satisfaction in the relationship. Could this be? As a divorce mediation attorney, I meet couples that are divorcing for a variety of different reasons. Sometimes, they even have a perfectly fine friendship but just don’t want to be married anymore. At Alternative Divorce Solutions, we really don’t explore the reasons that people get divorced in too much detail, let alone how the couple met.
This is because often times, as painful as the couple’s reason for divorce may be, it may not be relevant in getting them to settlement. It can be healthy to express your emotions during the divorce mediation process; however, long conversations about what happened and who’s fault it is aren’t always productive. As a divorce mediation attorney, the question I like to ask a couple is “is there anything you think I need to know about your relationship or divorce that may impact your settlement?” That being said, something like infidelity may have a huge impact on the mediation process. This is because infidelity can destroy the couple’s trust in one another and ability to communicate. Therefore, it can be relevant to the mediation process, as the divorce mediation attorney will need to know the couple’s dynamic.
In addition to infidelity, there are a lot of other factors that can influence the outcome of a divorce mediation. For example, if someone has spent money on the credit card without the other person’s knowledge, this can also lead to a lack of trust, not to mention a lack of communication. So, while we don’t look to how our couples got together like USA today, we can certainly explore why they are no longer together.