Being grateful is an important practice in each person’s life. Practice? Well, yes! You have to be intentional about it and keep making conscious efforts toward having more gratitude in your life.

Often, people going through a divorce can become very negative as they are confronted with the changes in their lives. That negativity can then become a habit. To combat negativity you can focus on the things that make you feel most grateful. Gratitude is a way to acknowledge the positives, in light of the negatives.

So how do you exactly practice gratitude when you are going through a divorce?

MAKE TIME Set aside a time of day to practice. You might want to do this first thing in the morning or when you are going to bed. But pick a time of day that works for you where you will have the mental energy to focus.

START WITH YOURSELF Think for a moment on what IS working in your life. It could be the very fact that your heart is beating, that you tasted something wonderful, or felt a cool breeze on your cheek. You might have a job you love, a family member that is supportive, or a great relationship with your children.

PICK ONE THING It can be overwhelming to focus on all the positives. Just pick one thing for the day. There is no pressure to find all the good stuff in your life at once. Having one thing can really help you hang onto gratitude when you are feeling stressed in your day.

VISUALIZE Now that you have an idea of one thing that makes you feel grateful, close your eyes and imagine it. Take a moment and relish in how it feels – engaging all of your senses.

REMIND YOURSELF Now that you have picked one thing and visualized it, take it with you throughout the day. When a difficult emotion becomes too much, go back to the one thing that creates gratitude in your heart. You might want to write it down or put a post-it note on your bathroom mirror.

The more you practice gratitude the more it will become an innate part of your day. You might notice yourself smiling more, reacting less, and enjoying life in spite of the stressors of your divorce.