When Mediation Isn't Working... How to move forward

Couples that choose mediation often have hopes of it resulting in a quick and peaceful divorce. However, there are times when mediation doesn’t work. How do you know if your mediation isn’t working? Often there is a stalling in the process. Neither party is able to compromise and therefore decisions cannot be made. You might also feel that the mediator is losing his or her role as a neutral. The lack of trust in your mediation process will hinder it from moving forward. So what do you do?

  • Try a different mediator Not all mediators are the same and you may find that another mediator might be a better fit for your personality or circumstances. Complex issues arise and some mediators may not know what is best for both of you. You want your mediator to be able to work with your needs and your personality.
  • Explore a collaborative process This is a process where both parties are individually represented outside of court and can involve other team members such as a therapist, financial advisor or child advocate. All of the team works to move the couple through the divorce by negotiating a decision that is best for all involved.
  • Go to a litigator If both parties cannot put their egos aside and are unwilling to compromise, then you will need to go to court and have a judge help determine the outcome of your divorce. This is of course, is a last resort for people. The turmoil caused by litigation can have a long term impact on you and your children. If you are considering litigation, please contact us first to see if we can help you avoid this process.

Divorce isn’t easy. Even if you choose mediation it can be difficult — and painful at times. We hope that you find the right professionals to guide you along your journey. Of course, we are always here to help.